Wear Me Down

CW: 99.0

I seem to be stuck... since going vegan, I though I would have actually lost weight. But nope... my grandpa made vegan brownie a la mode today for me so I had to eat that but I was only able to purge a small amount of it. The only other thing I ate today was a lettuce and tomato low calorie wrap. Even though that wasnt very much intake for the day, still I took 6 fucking dulcolax laxatives... starting now, tomorrow, no laxatives for at least 4 days. I am just worried that I am going to really hurt myself, being this stupid with the laxatives. Over the next week and a half, until the 15th, my 19th birthday, I will only be allowed to have the following, period:
Coffee
Water
Apples
Carrots
Peas, raw only
Broccoli
Celery
Grapes
Skinny water (amazing stuff)
If I feel the need to eat something else, then I will have to do 100 jumping jacks and 30 leg lifts each before I actually do so. That way, I will be too tired to lake anything besides the prepared fruits and veggies I have been stocking.

I finally made it to the gym. But I was only able.to go for about fifteen minutes because I had to wear a long sleeve shirt (people would probably be most if thy saw my arm, especially now that there are fresh scars on it. Update ok THAT later... so I was excessively lightheaded. I think it also has to do with the super abuse of laxatives in the last couple days, well, almost a week. No, more than hat even. About. Week and a half that I have been taking laxatives straight... wow.

So tired though. I can barely keep my eyes open, and this entry.prolly makes mo sense so ill elaborate tomorrow... sorry.

XXX

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